KaRaKiRiKoRoRo

Ah God, I thought at this period I already have my heart healed! But I was wrong. It still feel hurt. I still can't function normally as before. The memories, the feeling of missing him (for the talks, chat, and just sharing reels on IG), and all the expectation and plans I created: hurt me every day, even after 8 months passed. Did I do big sins in the passed? So I should endure this feeling, which felt like taking my life? Why can't I just forget him. Why just can't I stop from wishing him will reach out for me one day? What's wrong with you Beth? You've been so strong and happy before met him. You care nothing but only about your self and your happiness. But why should you put your self and happiness before him now? What is so special about him? Please, back to your happy version of Elisabeth. The woman who enjoy and love her self before anyone else. Who will not care about people who hurt your feeling. Ayo Beth, move on!! Ayo bahagia lagi tanpa berekspektasi tha...

August 9th 2023 We got matched on Tinder and you messaged me first, asking about what shouldn't you missed while you were on your vacay in Bali. With no expectation at all (as I gave up on dating app), I just gladly gave you some recommendations. As a 'thank you', you offered me a coffee date.   August 11th 2023 Felt like the universe was in our side, we made it with the coffee date and spent the whole night together too. It was a nice well-spent time, from coffee to pizza and some drinks.    August 12th 2023 The morning next day, as we separated, I just thought it wont getting anywhere. I hoped for nothing. Then in the evening, you messaged me asking how was my gym session. And you shared your plans for next few days and asked me whether if it possible for me to be part of  it. I was a bit surprise, because I didn't think you would ask me for that. Then all were flowing naturally. You kept updating me your activities and else. As I had the online training, it really...